Why criticizing others is not wise?

If you complain about others you are not doing wise. 99 per cent of people would not see the guilt on his side even if it is great. The person you criticize automatically begins to make excuses and feel almost compelled to defend, so your criticism is an absurd. It is also dangerous, because it is bad for self-esteem and pride of the criticized person and as a result this person becomes unfavorable to you. 

When you training an animal, it will do what you want faster and will better remember a particular trick, if you will be rewarded it for desired behavior, than if you used a penalty. It's the same with people. If you criticize someone, you usually do not change him. Instead, very often, that person will always have the regret about it. 

Is criticism can change what happened? Unfortunately not. Pretensions and dislikes due to criticism corrupt workers, family members and friends. Those whom we consider to be the culprits are trying to blame the other. This is due to human nature. If you were in their shoes you would do the same. 

Criticism is like a boomerang - always come back to you. You can be sure that the person you criticize or condemn, will want to get rid of guilt, even only in their own eyes, by blaming you. Do not make hasty judgments, because someone can judge hastily you too. Criticism and seeking those guilty is usually pointless. 

There is only one person that you can change, improve and instruct it is yourself. Do you want to change start with yourself. It is much better than trying to change others. It is also more secure. 

 "Don't complain about the snow on your neighbor's roof when your own doorstep is unclean." - Confucius 

 If you think that people always follow the logic that you're wrong. People equally, and even more cause by emotions, full of prejudice and pride that comes from vanity. 

 "Speak ill of no man, but speak all the good you know of everybody." - Benjamin Franklin

 Complaining, condemn and criticize is something that any fool can do and, interestingly, most fools do. Trying to understand and forgive requires character and self-control. However, we should strive with all our might to understand others rather than immediately condemn them. Ask yourself why others do what they do. It is more interesting and better than criticizing. In this way you will be seen as sympathetic, tolerant and kind man.

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Life Doesn't Have To Be A Struggle
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Life Doesn't Have To Be A Struggle

By Linda-Ann Stewart 

Recently, a belief surfaced for me that was an aspect of a deeper issue concerning the need to struggle. This specific belief stressed that I could only learn and grow through difficulty. It claimed that it was necessary for me to experience blocks and obstacles, since that was the only way to strengthen me.

It made me realize how pervasive this idea of struggle, suffering and difficulty is in our culture. From religion to business, we're conditioned to believe that life has to be hard and that we're born to suffer. Our society has made suffering and struggle a condition to aspire to. Not only is it condoned, it's expected. Think of the things you've heard from childhood.

• Life is hard
• Money doesn't grow on trees
• You have to work hard to earn a living
• Only by working hard can you get ahead
• You have to learn from your own mistakes
• You can only learn from challenges
• What doesn't kill you makes you stronger
• You'll never learn from other peoples' mistakes
• If you haven't struggled, then you don't appreciate what you have
• The only thing that teaches you is suffering
• If things come easily to you, then you're shallow because you haven't struggled
• You have to walk a mile in another person's shoes to appreciate their suffering

People actually play a game of one-ups-man-ship about how hard their life is. "I worked more hours than anyone else in the department," or "My life is harder/worse than anyone else's." They get perks from management with the first, and a jolt of power with the second (believe it or not).

If people like this try to draw you in, disregard them. No matter what you do, you can't please these discontented people. If you engage in their game, they'll keep upping the ante. When someone says something like that to me, my internal commentary is, "You win. I'd rather have an enjoyable life than a hard one."

It's true that suffering sometimes can encourage a person to grow. But more often than not, it just causes them to dig a deeper hole. Struggle may strengthen character, but it's more likely to cause a person to implode and be self-destructive.

When this belief surfaced for me, I realized that, to a certain extent and in limited amounts, struggle and suffering could be beneficial. It can wake us up and cause us to aspire to something better. Too much of it, though, and it's counter-productive. In large amounts, it doesn't build a person up, it breaks them down.

It's like stress. A little stress helps propel us to develop new ideas, new ways of doing things, and actually creates interest in life. What would life be without a little excitement? To build muscle, we stretch and stress them. But train too hard, and we strain or tear our muscles. Having too much stress for too long harms our health.

We can choose what to believe. Our beliefs create our reality. Since, in the past, I'd successfully transformed a belief to be more constructive, I decided to do the same thing with this one.

I considered how I could turn the idea of struggle around to be more in alignment with the Universe. What if the solution appeared as soon as I hit a snag? What if I could learn lessons while things flowed easily for me?

It may take some time for me to integrate these ideas, but I know that when I do, my life will be enriched. Try it for yourself. You just might be surprised at how wonderful your life can be without believing you need to struggle.

As a hypnotherapist, writer, speaker and success empowerment coach, Linda-Ann Stewart helps people rediscover their power and sense of self-worth. Visit "Secrets To The Law Of Attraction" at http://www.Cedarfire.com/secretstoloa.shtml to download your copy of this free ebook.

Article Source: Life Doesn't Have To Be A Struggle
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